Has Facebook and twitter turned us into a bunch of liars?

This article was originally published on http://voices.yahoo.com/have-twitter-facebook-turned-us-into-bunch-of-6615344.html by: Ayanna Guyhto 

 

“At a concert, you “tweet” how great the music is, and what a fantastic time you’re having. But the truth is that the sound system is garbled, the crowd is rowdy. And you really just want to get back to your car as quickly as possible. This doesn’t necessarily mean that you didn’t enjoy the show as a whole. But the image that you have drawn in people’s minds via your constant “Twittering” is much different: you’re living it up, having the time of your life. The rest of the world should be jealous.

If you are reading this, there is a 90% chance that you have a Facebook or Twitter account. And on your Facebook or Twitter account, you have probably sent updates about your breakfast, your workday, your thorny breakup, horrible rush-hour traffic – or even your latest nail color.

Twitter and Facebook make it extremely easy to update the world on the minutiae of what’s going on in our lives. We have seen Facebook used for “evil”: women use the social networking tool to bust their deadbeat baby-daddies; plenty of people have had their explicit romantic rendezvous uncovered. Some people are even jail bound because of the things that they have posted online.

But for the most part, if you look at the collection of photo albums, wall posts, and the multiple status updates – it’s easy to wonder whether or not these people are really telling the truth. Is the person who has been ranting and raving online really as angry as he/she appears to be? And what about the woman who has so deftly planted the most flattering photographs of her solo vacation? If you really think about it, it’s not much different from the kind of tomfoolery that people employ on typical dating websites.

You always want to be at your best; you want the person of the opposite sex to view you as a viable romantic option. This is normal. But how far are we willing to go to portray a certain image to the world that is colored slightly differently from what’s truly going on in our lives?

And furthermore is the instant gratification of Twitter and Facebook really to blame for these little white lies? It would seem that these two social networking devices encourage people to be more straightforward about their day-to-day activities. After all, the real-time nature of both of these social networking tools seems to automatically imply that what’s occurring is in fact, true – and happening to us at that moment.

How many times have you slightly embellished your status update to appear more inviting to those who read it? How many times have you appeared much more ticked off about your current circumstances than you really were? (Perhaps to gain sympathy?) And how many times have you used a status update in order to cover up something that you didn’t want people to know about? Potentially, any online tool can be abused and manipulated in a way that “tricks” others into believing what we want them to. We are addicted to Twitter and Facebook because of what these two social networks represent: acknowledgment. These social tools scream to the world “I’m here. I exist. I’m important.”

These two online entities certainly help us to connect, reconnect, network, advertise, blah blah blah… Most of us really do use Facebook and Twitter for its intended purposes: to keep up with the world around us and remain linked to those we love. Why these two social tools compel us to embellish is perhaps connected to a subconscious void that we are trying to fill. Isn’t it ironic that in a world where we have been trained not to believe everything we read, Facebook and Twitter have become the holy grail of reality?”

When he loves you but…

Eish this is a hard one… So here I am playing agony aunt to my friends love madness.. Heres her story.

“He’s in love and I’m not, not about to be, never! He loves me, I know he does, he adores me, worships the ground I walk on. He says the right things, does the right things, is there at the right moments but…well I love him, but not in the way he loves me. My love for him is more for lack of a better word ill say ‘innocent’. I appreciate him, hes amazing but…I have tried, God knows I have but the fire in me won’t ignite for him. The kinda of love he has for me is so genuine, so pure, so very beautiful… A friend once advised me that its better to be in a relationship with a man who loves you more than you love him, her point was that then at least your expectations are low, the possibility of heartbreak is minimal, I agree but its hard being on the receiving end of heartbreak but even worse on the giving side of it. I’ve broken up with him before but we got back together. He begged and pleaded and well I gave in, and honestly speaking I felt sorry for him, plus who doesn’t appreciate that undivided attention. I feel so guilty for being in this relationship and know for a fact that I’m just passing time until something better comes along.  (Yes I just did)  I’ve had my heartbroken often enough, so I’m entitled to break a few. He’s just a casualty in my madness. But my conscience is having it with me! Is this karma? If it is what has he done to be on the receiving end?”

Tjo…Dont know what so say shem. Have you ever been in a situation where you are loved but you don’t/can’t love that person? Unfortunately she was not specific about what it is that she can’t love seeing that this guy is “perfect”.  What would you do if you were in her shoes? Could it be karma? How does she “let him down gently”? Future lessons? Ho rough kantle kamo mos…